I've been feeling a little reflective lately, so I hope you'll bear with me. When I was growing up, all I ever really wanted to be was a mom. In school they would make us choose a "career path," so I just chose things that sounded exciting to me to keep them off my back. I was lucky enough to meet the right guy when I was very young, so I was married at an early age. We didn't plan to have children right away, but some things are out of your control and end up being great blessings in your life. I had a good job, but as soon as I had my baby, I knew that this was where I was supposed to be. We made the decision together that I would stay home and raise our children.
I received much support AND disdain for doing so. Sure, we would've made more money if I had gone back to work. But the time spent with them is something that cannot be bought. It passes so quickly and is fleeting. For fifteen years, I dedicated my entire life to them. I loved it. I relished in every first word, first roll, first step. I loved teaching them to pray, read, learn new things. But being a stay at home mother is not EASY. It's lonely, hard, frustrating. There is no lunch with colleagues, dropping the kids at a babysitter when they're cranky, no adult conversation. I, more often than not, felt like a failure, like I wasn't doing enough. You take the good with the bad. I was told things like "I can't do that. I WORK." "I can't help with carpool. I WORK." "You should be the PTA President, since you don't work." Truth is, I DID work. You think taking care of 3 little boys under 5 isn't work? All the time. And though the payment was not monitary, it was PRICELESS. Of all the jobs I have done, it was the most frustrating, overwheming, rewarding job I've ever had.
I've been on both sides of this situation. I know some don't have a choice whether to go back to work or not. I know that all situations are different. But please, be careful what you say. You don't know what people are going through, or why they made the decisions they did. Just because they didn't follow the same steps that you did doesn't mean they are wrong.
Happy Sunday Friends! Let's all try to be a little more understanding and compassionate.
